Have you ever found yourself in a place and just felt that the atmosphere wasn't right? You didn't quite know what was going on, but you know you had to get out. Well, yeah...that was me a few days ago. I didn't know what was wrong, I just knew something wasn't right. I left thinking it would all be better once I was out of there. Boy, was I wrong!! I found myself in a situation that was so uncomfortable that it actually made me MAD!! I mean really upset! I was complaining and complaining. As time went on, the situation just kept getting worse. It was as if things just kept happening, one thing after the other. I went from being angry to be hurt. I went from stomping and throwing things around to crying. With tears rolling down my face, I'm thinking could this get any worse?
After a while I knew what was wrong. I knew just how to fix it. I could hear God giving me directions. So, why did I not obey Him? I really don't know. I am one of those that will let my pride be a hindrance. It's something that I am working on. There will be times that we just can't do it all on our own. We have to put pride aside and seek help. This whole time I was running from the inevitable. I knew that eventually God would get me. He has a way of doing that, you know? I've realized that on my journey with Christ that is how it seems to go. I will carry all of my weight on my own shoulders just to fail miserably and break down in the end just to do what I was suppose to do in the beginning. Just give it to God. It's almost as if He has to break me down and allow me to reach rock bottom before I decide to call on Him. If I wanted to be freed from my situation, I had to be obedient and pray. I found myself praying prayers that I've never prayed. Before long my prayer became a full on cry out to God. I could hear Him saying, "That's all I wanted." All He wanted was for me to cry out to him. I may have failed and fallen on my face, but sometimes that is the best praying position.
When I couldn't handle it on my own, I had no other choice but to cry out to Him. I may have messed up my makeup before I even made it to church that morning, but it didn't matter because I was free from my burdens. "In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears." Psalm 18:6 (NIV) Tearstained and all, I was still able to put on my heels and walk freely with my head held high. In that moment, I had no worries. My prayers had been answered. He heard my cries and freed me. He had to show me, break me, and deal with me in only a way that He could. But He knew that my fall was inevitable and He was right there to catch me. All God wanted was my attention and knew just how to get it!
As this journey goes, I ask that you continue to pray for me as I pray for you! Be encouraged in you walk and don't wait until your back is against the wall to cry out to him. Don't be like me. Also don't put yourselves in situations that you get too caught up to give God the attention that he deserves. And remember, STAY GOLDEN!